I thought I would wake up today with gloom and fear in my heart. You see...as of right now...at 10:12 a.m., with a 5:00 p.m. deadline looming...we don't have the money to pay for our settlement.
We just don't.
It's not because we haven't tried.
Goodness knows we have spent countless hours and many sleepless nights trying to figure out how we were gonna do this.
Last night was our 15th annual Halloween Harvest Dinner with my Mom at her home.
|This was last years table!!|
This is a well loved tradition in the Ackman household!! It started when Jacks was 3 and Em was 6 months...it's something we look forward to every year.
Last night...we were all gathered around the table...tummies full of potroast, potatoes and pumpkin pie. I sat there listening and watching as my family joked and laughed with one another. A feeling of complete peace washed over me. I mean there we were...on the eve of what we had come to call D-Day...and instead of wallowing in our misery we were laughing. I mean laughing so hard tears ran down our face.
I looked from Jacks to Grams and Roger to Dave and Emma. All I could think about was how much this dear family of mine had been through in the past year. Sooo much sadness and heartbreak and struggles and trials. Days and nights of worrying and praying and pleading. Disappointments and fear.
And as I thought about all that... there was MY sweet, little family laughing and loving and enjoying one another.
I thought...how could this be?? I never, ever dreamed we would be here...ever....again. I mean I was so down, girls this past year that I never thought I would be up again. I never thought my kids would make good choices again. I never thought we were gonna make it through. I never thought we could be so happy again that we could laugh as tears rolled down our cheeks.
But we did.
And we are.
And we have learned so much.
To meet defiantly; face courageously.
This is what DARE means, girls. And let me tell you...I am meeting this day and the rest of my life with courage.
I refuse to let anyone take my Spirit away from me again.
I DARE to forgive and forget.
I DARE to laugh in the face of fear.
I DARE to love with my whole heart.
I DARE to pray.
I DARE to give my life to my Savior.
I DARE to Do it Anyway.
Last night, as I was sitting around that table...I realized that yes, these people can take our money, our home, our cars....but they can't have my family. They can't have my unwavering faith in my Lord Jesus Christ. They can't have my Spirit.
“It's daring to be curious about the unknown, to dream big dreams, to live outside prescribed boxes, to take risks, and above all, daring to investigate the way we live until we discover the deepest treasured purpose of why we are here.”
― Luci Swindoll, I Married Adventure
Dare to Live a Life full of courage and purpose, Girls!!!