Wednesday, September 7, 2011

My Big, Bold, Beautiful A-Ha Moment

** This is Part 1 of  my "Big, Bold, Beautiful A-Ha Moment". There is lots of rambling...I hope you can decipher it all...I just needed to get this all down so I don't forget where I've been and that I came out of it...stronger, happier and ready to pursue my Big, Bold, Beautiful Life.

**If you Twitter...please don't be offended. I am not saying Twitter is a bad thing in moderation:)



Most of us have dreams. Some of you may want to get in shape, run a marathon, start a business, travel overseas or start a family.

When we know what are dreams are...it's easy to set a few goals and begin working towards that dream.

Sometimes, though...we may get sidetracked. Life gets in the way. Our desires have to take a backseat to our family, jobs and home. And sometimes...it's none of above that throw us off track...it's us.

I have been in a funk.
I have been comparing myself to everyone and everything.

I was on Twitter, following all these Mom Blogs with thousands of Followers, reading their Tweets and thinking..."How do they do that? How in the world do they DO all they claim to? "

Have a blog,
make a meal,
throw spectacular birthday parties,
drive the carpool,
run a successful creative biz,
Tweet, Facebook,
and all the while maintaining a perfectly spotless and decorated home
all while wearing the latest fashions, hair and make-up.

It's exhausting.
Seriously, I was reading these Tweets thinking..."do these women ever sleep?" And more importantly "are they enjoying and living in the moments they are tweeting about?"

I found myself wanting to become like these women.
I'd have my Blackberry out at every event, tweeting about...

My groceries!
Em's soccer game!
Doctor's appointments!
School football games!


I found myself more concerned with my latest Tweet rather than what truly mattered...the actual moment.

Melody Ross is my mentor. I adore her style, her flair for vintage and I love how she shines. I mean , Melody just has this glow about her. She inspires me on so many levels.

I have taken two of her classes...Soul Restoration 1 & 2. Ladies, I highly recommend these two courses. They will truly change your perspective if you do the work.

Over the summer, Melody left Facebook for 90 days. Her words about her addiction and what she learned from staying off the computer all summer spoke volumes to me.

Here is an excerpt from that post that hit me like  a ton of bricks....

...and that it got to the point in my life where I was choosing a virtual life over a real life. I was choosing pixels over people. I was choosing the number of LIKE’s I ‘earned’ over my husband’s opinion of me, or my children’s opinion....or God’s opinion. I was choosing hours in front of the computer over all of the beauty that life has to offer. Most days I was very aware that this was NOT how I wanted to spend my time, but somehow, I just couldn’t really make myself stop.

When I read these words is as if I wrote them. "I was choosing hours in front of the computer over all of the beauty that life has to offer."

Twitter made me feel worthless...like everything I was trying to accomplish here was pointless. I don't have thousands of followers.

I don't have a...

perfect home

fashionable clothes
a thriving creative biz

Seeing all those women having all those things was making me second guess my dreams. I mean, if you don't have all of the above then how can you ever even have a piece?

I was losing sight of why I blog.
Why I create.
What I want to do.
What I do.

I write Words of Me Project to uplift, inspire and encourage....even if just ONE person is ever touched by what I say...then that will be enough. If ONE person is inspired to change their life for the better...then I am living my dream.


My Brave Art


Stay Tuned for Part 2....


14 comments:

  1. You are going on my HERO list. I stopped twitting and closed my FB account over a year ago and it was one of the best thing I ever did. Yes I check my own blog daily, and see what my creative soul friends are up to, but I don't let in consume me. I can go on and on.

    Your post are always interesting and real. You are BRAVE!

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  2. Beautiful words! It is so easy to get caught up in what we think we should be doing according to what others do than what feeds our own souls. A glorious first step. I always love your encouragement. :)

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  3. You inspire me! I read Melody's post about her FB addiction and I totally relate. I also relate to your feelings about comparing yourself (myself) to others' [virtual] lives and it overwhelms me! If I get one painting done a week, I feel like I've accomplished something! But even then, my house suffers for all the time I put into completing that painting!!! I'm not the biggest Twitter fan, btw. I use it to get the word out about my blog and Etsy shop, but I equate Twitter to a big room where a bunch of people are standing around shouting at each other! Anyway, I'm rambling - but I love this post! :-)

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  5. Leslie,
    I was a little addicted to facebook until July 2010. Someone said some really mean things about me (which were untrue.. long story).I was so hurt that this supposed friend had spread these lies... so I put my FB into dormant status. That was one positive thing that came from this. I have never even tried Twitter. I personally don't get why Twitter is so LOVED. From the first time I heard about it until now I have thought that It seems like a very ego centered form of social networking. Seriously... why do people care that at this very moment I'm getting ready to bake my husband his favorite dish or that my kids just got off the bus and they are late... or that I am sitting in my craft room wondering what to paint.
    I reactivated my FB account in the last couple months and only get on to check a few FB groups(I can count on one hand... the accounts that I look at... and your's is one of them). The only other thing I do on FB is keep in contact with family in Mexico who I have lost contact with in the last 20 years. So.. my real addiction is the blogs. On my own blog I have a sidebar of about 20 favorite blogs. I am able to scan what the last post for each blog is and if it's of interest to me then I go to the actual blog. So... I usually spend about an hour and a half a day doing this. I probably should cut it down. It's just so hard!!!
    I love your blog Leslie...because I think you are so great! and talented! and Fun!!! I don't feel like I need to try and be as good as you. Though... being as good as you would be wonderful! I can just enjoy and learn from your blog. Thanks for having an uplifting blog that inspires me and many others!
    Maggie Goebel

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  6. Oh, my friend . . . I have a million and one things to say about this post . . . And honestly looked all over for your phone number (why don't I have your phone number?!?!?!!!!) to call you and discuss. So I'll tell you some of my thoughts here. I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND what you are saying . . . And think i found myself in that whole state of "compare" about a year ago. It took me a little bit of time to work through it . . . And had that same a-ha moment that you write of. My friend . . . WE ARE ENOUGH! And even more than that, we are QPRETTY DARN INCREDIBLE as we are. This while post proves to me that you and are really on the same road right now, my friend. Creatively, personally, spiritually. And you know what? I can't imagine another soul to walk with. Now, EMAIL ME your phone . . . So I can call you!!! QI have so much more to tell you, but won't take up your readers time. HUGS my friend! I am SO PROUD of your BRAVE SELF!!!!!

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  7. Sorry for the typos . . . My iPad drives me crazy sometimes, and I was very passionate about my comments, I didn't proof!!!! ah, well . . . That's the authentic ME, baby!!!! And it's pretty darn perfect that way!!! ;)

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  8. Oh, Leslie, how this post made me smile, and feel that calm you get when you realize the A-HA!!! Best words you say are, "if just ONE person is touched by what I say...then that will be enough". That's it, Baby!!! You got it in a nutshell right there!! Embrace this moment!!
    Peggy K from Small Steps to Giant Leaps.

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  9. I'm right there with you! I've been stepping back from a lot of virtual stuff to embrace the blessings that God has given to me. I actually have been feeling a tad bit guilty because I've found my expression through digital art and I've been finding myself in front of the computer again, but it's been constructive. I've gotten back to blogging to inspire and couldn't even tell you how many followers I have. I'm no longer concerned about those things. I am blogging again on my time and things that I feel will inspire others or are words being expressed from my heart. I've unfollowed the blogs that have every other blog post a review on a product. I actually cleared out my google reader and am only following the blogs that inspire me - which has cut my blog reading time almost to nothing. I can't express how relieving it is to me. I look back at my twitter and think to myself..... how in the world did I ever have time to tweet the randomness that I was so into tweeting - the thing is, I really didn't. I adore you, leslie, and I feel like you and I are on the same level on so many levels and I will always be inspired by you.

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  10. I must agree with Maggie, that you're on my hero list. You're an inspiration. But I've been feeling the same way, envying the moms out there that appear to do it all and have it all. I must say that I'm working on appreciating the moment and appreciating all that I have (while balancing an online presence--before my blog break I would sometimes feel like I was living life from the perspective of "this would be a great blog post" rather than "this is an amazing moment and this is my life, right now"). I can relate to you so completely. You know you should visit Tiffany Moore's blog (www.craftyfanny.com). I've had the wonderful chance to be coached by her and her last couple blog posts are some of the best things she's shared with me. It's all about perspective and a need to sometimes change it. Take care of yourself.

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  11. I'm attempting to do something. I deleted my old blog. It got to be where all i worried about was who's following me, who's commenting, are my posts pleasing to them. Right now life is a black hole for me. So I'm trying to pull myself out before it gets too late. Keep up the good work.

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  12. What a great post! This is one of those that should hit top numbers on social media!! The geeks and pro-bloggers say, "Content is King". Keep inspiring us like this and you will be one of those "King" bloggers... or should I say Queen lol

    As for social media, use automated tools to limit those hours in front of the puter!

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  13. Lol..Leslie..I am right with you...what is twitter and how does it work..i automaticallyjoined when I got my phone...Mmm..irs a mystery to me..I may or may not have tweeted..lol....Facebook us one thing thY u only go on if I get an email that someone's wants to bevome friends...I accept and check it for 5 minutes....not an addiction...yay me!!....but..blogs...now that is another ball game...I love them..thoufh gaf a life yesterday and missed your post....I have around ten people thay i feel a connection wirh and love to visit their blobs..I am sure they know who they are...wink wink...sadly I have art fashion and perfect home envy too..i get it from blogs...but I think I have it u.
    Nder control..I am me..I am a pretty nice person. who adores her familt aNd friends ....I dapple in msking my home a better place...occassionally tryinf to look awesome and tdging to have fun beinf creative...tofay I am happy with that...know that you are an inspiration and do haVe an effect in a positive way.xxx

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  14. Dear Leslie, I reads Melody's posts!! I love you just the way you are!! (((((HUGS))))) You inspire me.

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I appreciate your thoughts and ideas...they inspire me!! I will be visiting you soon. Have a CREATIVE day!!

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